Fake Craigslist ad of the week April 5 2016

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Where da white girlz at? M4w Roxbury

Yo’ listen to dis shit, ima be reelz I’m like 2 fitty shoulda been a pro baller then I caught this felony bullshit. I’m looking for a white girl wit dat plump ass, and some big ol’titties. My dream shorty is like fitty pacent Kim Kardashian and fitty pacent Adele, and fitty pacent J-Lo, and fitty pacent That old white bitch that cooks food.

Yo catch this rhyme girl, I made it for you:

I’m dat dude wit the biggest debt

Don’t be hating we ain’t met,

Imma stick my tongue in yo ass

I’m a real player straight outta mass

You can give me a handy and all dat shit

You say I gots to wear a rubber

I’m yo hood rat lover

And you gone make a nice single momma

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Are motorcycles safer than airplanes?

Todd Binkleman of the Harley Institute believes motorcycles are a safer mode of travel than an airliner.  He cites the following facts:  Plane crashes on average kill over 200 people, whereas motorcycle crashes result in an average of .7 people getting killed.  He also pointed out that a plane crash can result in residual damage to property as debris lands on houses and local area businesses.  “A motorcycle,” he stated matter of factly, “is already on the ground, it doesn’t fall per se; in fact the only the thing that is airborne is the operator, but he’s usually flying through the air dead already, so his landing spot is no big deal.”  We quickly pointed out that his facts had some merit, but that the number of airplane crashes is substantially fewer in number than the amount of motorcycle crashes.  In fact, as we pointed this out to Todd, a stoned-out biker flew by us, smashed into a retaining wall and exploded on impact.  It was ironic and hilarious at the same time.  Todd responded to our points by saying, “You can’t look at it that way; things crash and that is that; you just have to choose what kills less people, so I strongly suggest people buy more motorcycles and fly less.  At the very least, I think the airlines should rip out all the seating and replace them with motorcycles.  If the plane is going to crash, the airline can at least give the passengers the option of opening the emergency door and getting sucked out into the atmosphere on a bike.”