Keurig Kold pisses off Al Sharpton

Keurig Green Mountain Company has announced its latest product, the new single brew machine named the “Keurig Kold.” The new product has Al Sharpton fuming.

Al Sharpton commenting on the item had this to say, “Never has there been a more deliberately racist product than this.” Our staffers were pretty surprised that Sharpton didn’t follow his normal A,B,A,B rhyme scheme when providing his comments.

Sharpton added, “This product stands for the very foundation of hate, the abrasive nature of the abbreviated name alone suggests that Keurig is a sponsor of hate.” We asked Mr. Sharpton what the fuck he was talking about and he replied, “Keurig Kold Kup, its KKK man, you don’t have to be Alex Jones to figure this one out.” We told the Reverend that the item is actually called Keurig Kold and the word cup is not in the title of the product, and that the word cup is not spelled with a K, he angrily said,”Don’t you think I know how to spell? I can spell,” he said as he went on a spelling rampage, “cup, k.u.p. catsup, K.e.t.c.h.u.p, racist K.e.u.r.i.g.’

Related: Volkswagen admits that it’s pretty funny that hippies are driving VW beetles to anti-smog rallies.


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