Chelsea Resident Tom Pickins not happy about Confederate Flag debate.

Beantown Beatdown

Clinton Gore


Add Tom Pickins of Chelsea to the list those who don’t want to see the Confederate flag taken down in South Carolina.  We were curious if he was a slave owner, but Tom denied this accusation.  “If I was a slave owner, I’d be whipping all of ya wouldn’t I?  And I’d be making cracks about watermelons and your big lips too.”  This made no sense as our entire staff is lily white, but we digress. What is upsetting Tom is the potential problems that will occur with his favorite TV show, the Dukes of Hazzard.  “I reckon they gonna have to edit the shit out of dat shit,” he said, suddenly taking on a southern drawl. “Take away the flag from the car and basically I’m just watching Knight Rider.  You don’t know it’s the south anymore, so there’s no pondering if the brothers is incestually banging their hot sister, Roscoe P. Coltrane and Boss Hogg have to have more intelligent dialogue and they gotta edit out all the car jumps cuz only a backwoods idiot would  jump a canyon.”



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